Kids And Bullies

How do you talk to your kids about bullies? Being a mom it is so difficult to wrap your head around the fact that someone could be making your kids life terrible, and you want to protect them of course but how do you do that without going crazy? Some people will say to tell your kids to be a bigger person and walk away but sometimes it does not always end up that way. In this day and age, these bullies will resort to anything to make the kids life horrible. Do you tell them to stand up to them? This will most likely end up in a fight or who knows what happens. What is the best approach?


posted by razz @ 6:59 AM,


At September 3, 2008 at 6:51 AM, Blogger BikerMomma said...

This is truly a difficult and scary subject for all parents. We all know that bullies are essentially cowards who only pick on the weak and insecure. I found that the best way to deal with that was to enrol my son in martial arts classes. The fighting ability truly is secondary, as they learn that fighting is only to be used as an absolute last resort and only in self-defence. It's all about raising the child's self-confidence levels, so that the bully is less likely to choose them as a target in the first place. They also learn real world bully-proofing techniques, like how to avoid situations where a bully can corner them, how to talk to a bully so that they are more likely to leave your child alone in the end, and, yes, what to do if a bully takes a swing at them despite all their precautions. Far more effective than the usual vague advice to "just walk away", and delivered by people in the know, as opposed to me, who has never been in this kind of situation in my life.

At September 3, 2008 at 11:02 AM, Blogger Lisa said...

My son was very timid in Middle School. I believe that this is the type of kid that gets picked on the most. I always told him to "ignore it and whatever you do, don't get into a fight". Well, he had taken all he could handle from his bully and one day when the kid taunted him and shoved into him, my son lit into that boy and the teachers had to pull him off. Sad to say, he gained a lot of respect from the other kids for standing up to the bully. He was never bullied again.

At September 3, 2008 at 12:04 PM, Anonymous goofymom said...

I used to tell my kids to walk away. Well this summer, walking away wasn't help them at all especially when other kids tried to hurt mine. We started telling them to fight back or defend themselves IF someone try to hurt them. My kids are often picked on because they are bi-racial kids. Once other kids get to know mine better, they usually stop harrassing mine.

At September 4, 2008 at 7:05 AM, Blogger Barbara said...

I was the kid that was picked on in middle school and it sucks to be picked on all the time. I think it had to do with being poor. We didn't have the money for name brand clothes, and other popular kids take that and run with it. It still has an impact on my thinking to this day and I believe this is why my self-esteem is so low.
Barbara :)

At September 4, 2008 at 5:20 PM, Blogger Jocelyn said...

I would meet with the bullies' parents and make sure that they know what their kids are doing to my kid.

I'm not on this yet as my kids are still too little. Hopefully I don't have to deal with too much of this kind of drama, but I guess when you have kids it will happen.

Just stopping by to say hi! You've changed your blog design..still nice! :)


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